Geek and Sundry: How Did Board Games Change Your Life?

Geek and Sundry is asking a question; How did board games change you life?

A very interesting question for me especially since this year Tabletop Day falls on a trigger date for me.  April 29th.  This feels like a good time to share this story.

April 29 2011 should have been the day our first child was born.  

Whoa hold the phone!  I know this could be a sad and maybe taboo topic but I mean this to be an inspirational story.  Please, stay with me. 

It had taken a long time to conceive and we were overjoyed at the news, and then immensely devastated with life’s turn of events.  I can’t tell you how long it was after that we discovered this little game called Carcassonne.  Because you see, grief like that, it distorts your concept of time.  

During that period in my life, I felt lost.  I didn’t know how to function around people any more.  Something horrible had happened and I felt disconnected from life.  I felt disconnected from everyone.  Even Justin.  

But this game.  It was almost magical.

It gave me something interesting to focus on.  Something fun.  Because fun was a foreign concept to me at that time.  This pile of cardboard and wooden bits gave me what I needed to build a bridge reconnecting myself to life and relearn how to interact with people again.  

Seems strange, I know, but at times like that, many couples drift apart in grief.  We didn’t experience that but for awhile I couldn’t find myself anymore.  

This shared experience of finding this whole new culture to immerse ourselves in gave me something to share and to bond over.  It was a life preserver in the sea of my grief.  

Immersed we were, we jumped in with both feet and in up to our necks!  All the new concepts and terminology we learned together in a short period of time.  It was intoxicating.  Not a distraction from the loss.  But a new focus.  A passion ignited for this hobby that I will be forever grateful for.  

The grief was still there, it always will be, tucked safely away, and that is fine.  That is normal.  Because love never dies.

My life would be a lot different every April 29th if our children were born on earth instead of to heaven.  I’m not saying life would have been better, or worse for that matter.  I’m saying, “I’m present!” in the here and now and that, is wonderful.

I’m thankful that I’m at a point now that I can open my home to people on that date “April 29th” instead of closing the curtains and shutting out the world.  

A big part of my healing has been sharing this hobby with my Sweetheart (sometimes Rival) Justin.

Thanks for reading this.  

Remember, if you are lost, you will find your way to be found.  

Promise.

xoxo, Charla